Confessions of an Addict

(Reposted from October 27th, 2001 – Dave)

I’ve been hooked on this shit since I was young. It was hard to get in elementary school but I used to steal it from my dad. When I was ready to go to high school we moved to Hawaii. Now, it was more readily available, you could score it in high school, you could get it on the streets. They had some high quality shit in Hawaii, let me tell you!

Dad was still my main supplier, although he never knew it… He always used it responsibly, but I was left with the ends and the bits and pieces I could scrounge. I would always need more and more, never satisfied but never really having much money for a serious habit, when you are a teen with no job, cash is hard to come by…

Later I joined the service and, after boot camp, I thought I was in heaven! All I could want was laid at my feet, almost begging for to pick it up. I had the money, I had the time, I had the desire! I remember many an hour would pass, me staring off into space, my fingers working furiously, my ears hungered for the hissing and snapping it would make.

Still later after I left the service, with all the new regulations and such, and me being out of the business and married, I weaned myself from it. I really had no excuse to have it around and I didn’t want my wife to know I had a problem. So I thought myself cured…

Earlier this afternoon a package came here at work, they did not know who it was for so they brought it to me. As I was inspecting the contents of this package the SHIT JUMPED OUT AT ME! I screamed, I whimpered, I sobbed, I begged, I sighed… and finally I succumbed…. Clean for 10 years, all gone to pot…

A few mindless minutes staring off into space… my fingers sore, I’d been out of practice for so long… and now I’m totally hooked again… I don’t even know where to get it from anymore…

Hi, I’m Dave… and I’m a bubble-wrap junkie.

Moving Done, “Native” Americans

Finished up the moving, got everything in the new house, in boxes and stacked around everywhere. Yesterday I got the computer up and finally got the cable installed for the TV. I didn’t miss the TV, I’m not much of a TV person. TV is pretty much a vast cultural wasteland, not unlike New Jersey (joke). I pretty much use it for background noise, while I’m web surfing or such…

A mile of so east of the new house is the site of an ancient Native American village that was lived in and abandoned before any white folks stepped onto the continent. There’s a big field and huge grassy mounds, some with a ring of trees on top. They had to close off the biggest mound to tourists, there was a lot of snake and spider bites to be had up there. I guess the old chief’s spirit didn’t appreciate being walked on…

Last month they had “Native American Days” in a field adjacent to the archeological site. Got to watch Native American dance their traditional native dances to the sound of traditional Indian chants and drums being blasted through amplifiers. Also got to appreciate the traditional native costumes, some of which were festooned with neon orange ostrich feathers, CD discs, bicycle reflectors and shiny polyvinyl plastic streamers.

I really love to see the old traditional stuff. Real freaking traditional.

Moving Pains

I’m in the process of moving from my house to another apartment on the other side of town. What a pain in the ass… Getting all the little stuff from one place to another is hard enough when it’s just me and the wife. I’ll have to rent a truck and get help for the big stuff. My job gives me lots of free time during the day, but all my friends have to work. Guess it will be just me and the wife. We’ve done it before…

The Carrot and the Stick

The more I think about it, the more I believe there is something fundamentally wrong about how we are waging war on Afghanistan. Why are we bombing the hell outta them with one hand and yet we are dropping food to them with the other? What’s up with that? We did not do this in any other war we’ve been involved in. Did we drop food on Dresden and Hamburg by day and firebomb them by night? I don’t think so…

If we feed these non-combatant folks it makes them happy to just sit there and munch instead of getting off their asses and getting rid of the regime that is starving them. That will make the job of the grunts that have to go in that much harder… Just as an aside, do you really think starving folks in Afghanistan know what peanut butter even is, much less what to do with it?

Lately on the news there has been lots of talk about what kind of “nation building” we are going to do after the war. Well, guess what! The purpose of war is to kill people and break stuff! The purpose of war is to get rid of people who threaten us… Setting up a new nation is their problem.

Let the United Nations pinheads do the “nation building”… they are no freaking good at anything else…

Do I Care?

When I though about it a bit, I’m not sure that I care whether the US military smacks the crap outta Afghanistan. You can’t really bomb them back to the stone age, they are already there. I don’t think the US is stupid enough to start bombing Afghans indiscriminately. Hopefully, we have learned better than that.

Reports out of Israel say it’s IRAQ, good ole Saddam, who paid for or planned the dirty deed. Now there is someone who would be worth a good pounding. Maybe first thing we do it flatten everyone of Saddam’s 50 or so palaces. That might actually be worth something. But still, what will it mean? Will it stop terrorists from attacking us or will it just make them pissier? I’m confused…

Are we really surprised?

The 9-11 attack and the coming response… Should we be surprised? Haven’t “humans” been doing this to each other for about 100,000 years? People start identifying with a certain group, religion, ethnicity, nationality and from then on everyone who believes something different of what your group, religion, ethnicity, nationality believes is the enemy and it to be destroyed! I’m sure it all started when we were in the caves! One group would yell to the other:

OUR GOD HAS A BIGGER DICK THAN YOUR GOD!

And then the other group, knowing that that statement could not possibly be true, take offense and rush out to defend their god and everyone starts smacking each other in the skull with large pieces of wood…

I don’t identify myself with any group, religion, or ethnicity (and I only call myself an American because I and a card carrying, dues-paying member of that particular group). What I am is an old white guy, pushing forty and spouting some really freaked up ideas. I’m just a part of the audience, watching the world fall apart and enjoying the entertainment.

A Sign of the Apocalypse?

I caught the last part of the Mega TV Telethon that was on almost every network and cable channel last night. I caught Paul Simon singing “Bridge Over Troubled Water” Very eerie with all those candles. Very cool song, though. And then Celine Dione (ain’t she a Canadian?) came on to sing “God Bless America” and my ears slammed shut, and I had to change the channel and watch the Home Shopping Network for a few minutes while I waited for the ringing in my ears to subside…

When I returned to the show, Willy Nelson and a whole bunch of folks were singing, can’t remember the song. When I saw Sylvester Stallone and Dennis Franz and a whole passel of other Hollyweird residents singing in the group, I took that for a possible sign of the APOCALYPSE, shut down the tube and went to bed with my pillow over my head. Oh, well…

Notice how fast humans revert to their old, nasty habits. I just heard reports of looting, thefts and robberies around the WTC. I am not really surprised… When things get really shaken up, it seems the scum soon rises to the top. This and the many charity scams going on just goes to show you how, when some people see terrible problems, other people see tremendous opportunities…

Happy New Year and more…

Happy New Year!

It’s Now Year 5762! Happy New Year!

I’m not Jewish but I think I’ll start counting years like this… makes me feel younger than my 39 years. which means I was born in 5723. From 5723 to 5762 seems like a lot smaller amount that from 1962 to 2001. I like that!

Not that I mind getting old, but this is the prime time to be alive! So many exciting things, both good and bad are happening. Or as George Carlin might say: “We are in for a great deal of ENTERTAINMENT!” This from a guy who is looking for a Richter scale 25 earthquake, just for the entertainment value, or at least that’s what George said to Art Bell a few years ago.

George Carlin is great and most times hits the nail square on the head!

Cold Blood Anyone?

If we don’t get a little cold blood to show the American People and soon, folks are gonna get a little pissy. News-heads are telling us “the war” may last three to five years. Is our attention span anywhere that long? Doubt it…

Tittie Bar Crisis and more…

Tittie Bar Crisis

The current crisis has really had a bad effect on the business done at tittie bars. All the parking lots are nearly empty…

Till They Glow

Someone on the radio was talking about a report someone else wrote that said we should use tactical nukes when we get our revenge. It bothers me only slightly and not for the reasons everybody thinks. I’m worried about this escalating into a “my dick is bigger than yours” fight. If we use nukes, what will they use next?

Otherwise I’m all for it…

Flag Flying

Everyone is trying to buy US flags around here. Most of these are folks who wouldn’t have bothered to fly the flag before 9-11. I travel a lot and see a bunch of new flags going up. Wonder how many of these flags will still be up by Christmas… after all gotta make room for the plastic Santa and the glow in the dark reindeer.

I fly the flag all year round, in case you care…

Who’s to Blame?

We’re all looking around trying to find out who is to blame for the terrible events of yesterday. Many folks are yelling for revenge. My opinion?

We need to find out beyond a shadow of a doubt, and them we need to do to them what they have done to us. The world is a different place that it was yesterday. Therefore we need to handle this differently. Nations that harbor the folks who did this to us need to be hit and hit hard. But lets make sure we got the right folks first… everyone thought that brown people were responsible for Oklahoma City. But it was a clean cut American boy that pulled that off.

Those of you who still believe in GOD, send out your prayers. Me? I’ll just sit here in contemplation… and then get on with the business of life in a world that has been forever changed by man’s inhumanity to man…

(2018 Update: I got better…)

The Beginning of the End…

Is this a fucked up world we live in or not. If I had any reservations about the existence of GOD… I for sure know there ain’t one now. We are a doomed species, just playing out the hand. Taking one more turn around the bowl as we head for the drain.

Maybe we weren’t really meant to be at the top of the food chain… you think?

(2018 Update: For a while I was quite exercised and like many others, I started blogging seriously just to get the release. I’m much better now and my personal relationship with God is solid. I don’t give him any shit, he don’t give me anything I can’t handle – Dave)